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" Taking it All "Written By: Emerald Pillow Warnings: angst and lemon (so far) Pairings: 1x3x1, 3+4 Disclaimer: I don't own GW or the characters, though I'd like to. You can try to sue me for messing up their lives royaly, but all you'll get is my cat that looks like Trowa, but named Duo. Author's note: This is probably the first fic that I started posting before finsihing it. . .so it may take a little longer to get everything up than usual. . .but I hope you enjoy it, and hopefully your requests will push me to finish it. . .since I haven't finished one in a loooooooooong time. Kudos
"Taking it All " Chapter 16 Quatre woke with an immense headache. He slowly sat up in bed, holding his head in his hand. This was probably why he rarely got as drunk as he did. Getting his hangover, somewhat under control, his eyes searched the room for Trowa. The taller man was sitting in an overstuffed chair in the corner of the room. His emerald gaze was locked on Quatre, a gleam to them that the blonde hadn't seen in a long time. Wordlessly, Trowa tossed something to Quatre. As a reflex, he caught it, and then looked down to find that it was a small packet of aspirins. His aquamarine eyes then shifted, instinctively, toward the small table next to the bed; a glass of water sat, waiting for him. It wasn't until after he ripped open the packet that he gave his appreciation that started their conversation. "I'm sorry I came back drunk last night Trowa." "All of us need a way to unwind Quatre." Quatre looked up at hearing his name. It was unusual for Trowa to call him anything but 'kitten' when they were alone; it only meant that he was being serious. "Trowa, did I do or say something last night that hurt you?" "Not so much hurt. . .more or less just realize." "Realize what?" "That I need to stop punishing you and Heero." "Heero?" "I'm done pretending Quatre, I thought you'd appreciate that. I know you've been wanting to hear it, so, here it is. . ." Tears welled in Trowa's eyes, and his voice cracked slightly. Quatre stared at his lover, his own eyes misting. He had wanted Trowa to confide in him, but now he wasn't sure he wanted to hear it. "For the pass seven months, I've been seeing Heero behind your back." Quatre closed his eyes, and bowed his head, not wanting Trowa to see his tears. It hurt, more than he had expected. "For the pass eight days, we've been having sex. I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you." "Then why. . .why did you have to turn to him, of all people? Couldn't you just have cheated with the pool man? Isn't that how it's suppose to be? A complete stranger that I know nothing about? Why did it have to be the one person I truly hate with all my heart?" Quatre's tears dropped to the blanket that was still covering him. "Because he's the only one that noticed what was happening to me." Quatre raised his eyes toward Trowa. "What do you mean?" "You did everything for me Quatre. You even gave me something that I never had before, but now it's slipping from me." Quatre still seemed confused at this explanation. "I'm numbing myself, to everything, even when we make love. I didn't even realize it until last night. I couldn't understand why being with him made me feel the way it did, now I understand that it's because he was making feel again." "I never once asked you to stifle how you felt Trowa. I never told you to push away everything and attempt to be perfect in front of colleagues and family." "I know you didn't." "So why do I have to suffer for your decision?" "It's the only way I could repay your kindness. I seen what happens when I act out. I didn't want anything I said or did to come down on you. As far as your sisters go, I know you love them, and family is the most important thing in life. None of them will readily accept us, but I was too foolish to see that. I thought that I could make them accept it, so you wouldn't have to defend it every time you were with any of them. It's not your fault, it's only my own. I never wanted you to be a causality in this, but as long as I stay, you always will be." "We can work it out. There's got to be a way." "There isn't." "We've worked out everything we came across in the pass three years." Trowa slowly shook his head. "No Quatre. I just always let you have your way. I thought it didn't matter, as long as I could be with you; but I was wrong." "I'll start listening better Trowa, I swear I will." "It's too late for that anyways." Trowa allowed his distant gaze to fall to the carpet. "What do you mean?" Trowa swallowed hard. His heart was screaming the words, but they became lost when attempting to reach his voice. "Trowa?" "I. . .I fell for him." Quatre couldn't think, or even breathe. He only stared at Trowa with growing fear and pain. "I think I'm in love with Heero." Anger tidal waved over Quatre as he listened to Trowa's voice pronouncing these words. In the three years that they've been together, Trowa couldn't say anything close to that toward Quatre. Every time 'I love you' spilled from Quatre's lips, Trowa had never really responded. Quatre had believed that it was because of the way he was raised. Now, hearing this type of affection toward Heero burned him deeply. It wasn't fair. Heero wasn't the one that placed so much time and effort into keeping a relationship alive. He wasn't the one that healed Trowa's bleeding heart; or nursed him back into life. Heero wasn't the one that woke up next to him with nightmares of the past. This statement could only mean one thing; Heero had to be taken out of the picture. . .now. ~ * ~ Chapter
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