"Where My Demons Hide"

Written By: Diana Lua

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing and I don't make any money with this. It's just a work for fans and for fun.

Pairings: 1x2x1, 13x5; Background pairing: 4x3x4, Solox2, 6+2, 9+6, H+2, R+1, S+5 and maybe more…

Warnings: AU, Yaoi, SLASH, NC-17, alternating POVs; - Mainly a romance, drama with lots of angst and some action;

- Time: some fictional medieval age, nearly the 10th century (without technology nor gundams);
- Place: Earth with fictional context (not really caring about the real History);
- Supernatural contents (demons, angels and dragons).
- Some magic like seals, curses and spells (the 'Crimson Spell' kind, nothing like 'Harry Potter' things);

Rating: NC 17

Summary: Being captivated by a strong and devastatingly beautiful demon, that was captured very wounded, was just the start of the changes in Lord Heero Yuy's life. The implications of relating with the creature were as dangerous and revealing about things in the world that he had never before dreamed.

"Where My Demons Hide"

 

04Trust

"No matter what we breed

We still are made of greed"

"Shit!" There was no other thing to say when the green eyes of Trowa found his lord walking slowly, holding a hand on the wall to catch his balance. He was wearing the same clothes from the day before, just dirtier; the marks on his neck were darker and he had blood, red blood, staining the right sleeve of his shirt. Trowa rushed toward him, helping him to walk and climb the stairs to his room.

The tall one was a much more observant man than a talker; he asked for warm water and some food from the servants before stopping to look at his lord and friend.

"Thanks," Heero simply said, seated tired on his bed.

"Good that it was me and not Chang that found you in these conditions."

The lord rubbed his eyes thinking of the argument before. "Well, I don't think I will be able to get him off my case about it anyway."

Trowa agreed, remembering how he saw the chinese coming out the demon's room last night, cursing and wanting to beat down everything on the way. But, for now, that wasn't the most important thing.

He didn't need to ask. He knew exactly what Heero was feeling about the creature. He saw the beauty and the loneliness in the demon's eyes and he saw the way Heero's eyes shined in the darkness of the dungeon, the thickness of his voice asking for a tranquilizer, the care he had with it when he could get near to treat its wounds. Besides, they grew up together and knew each other very well.

"Heero..."

"I'm ok," he snapped back. "Just need to clean myself and rest for a few hours..."

Trowa bit his tongue. It wasn't his business and he normally wouldn't intrude in it. But that wasn't a normal situation and they've been friends for too long, so he spoke cautiously but plainly. "Just be careful. We don't know nothing about it or what it could do..."

Heero snorted irritated. "He won't do anything."

Trowa stepped forward and caught his arm, shoving the stained dirty sleeve. He saw the bite mark understanding exactly what it meant. "I assume that it's not dying anymore, but this was very... reckless."

Heero pulled his arm back. His hand covering the wounded wrist, unconsciously rubbing it. "I know. I... know, but nothing bad happened."

"Are you sure it is trustworthy?"

The lord couldn't find words or strength to look for a whole explanation, besides even he himself didn't fully understand those... feelings. "He told me his name, and said he won't harm me."

"And you are... taking a demon's word?"

And there was Trowa to remind him again about his own faults. He was just too tired to argue or even think.

Some servant knocking broke the conversation and Trowa preferred letting it rest, at least for now. He opened the door letting the servants come in, food and rest were the main priorities.

"Trowa... send someone to clean his bathroom. It would be nice if you could go with... It's... a big mess and I don't want to scare the servants..." Heero said sheepishly.

"All right," he said leaving, no less concerned.

When he climbed down the stairs, he wondered if it would be better to first see the 'big mess' before bringing anyone in there. He was very conscious about how fast and far the rumors were spreading. There was probably at least something on everyone's tongue; it wasn't exactly a secret that they brought a demon into the castle.

And he was right.

Trowa cursed once he opened the door, seeing all that black blood on the floor, dirty rags spread all over, some black feathers, scratches on the bathwood, rocks cracked on the wall. It looked like there had been a battle against a whole group of demons in there, except for the lack of bodies.

He walked to the other door. It was opened already and right away his eyes met the demon's. The creature was sitting on the floor leaning against the bed. His face was cold, eyes locked on him.

Duo had heard the steps long before even though it was a very silent way to walk. He was alert, but didn't move. Partly because it would be painful, partly because he didn't feel any bad intention. When Trowa appeared in his sight he recognized the man from the dungeon; he had been beside the lord there.

They watched each other in deep silence, each one trying to read different things.

For Trowa, the demon didn't appear much better than when he was in the dungeon, but he didn't see him 'dying' like Heero had said.

For Duo, behind the strong and muscular frame he felt curiosity and concern. But with a cautious look he could feel something more, something that wasn't exactly feelings. Could be some seal, or some spell, but something surrounded him, very subtle, that probably would pass unnoticed. He never had seen something like it before.

"What do you want here?"

"I want?" The purple eyes strengthened dangerously. "You are the ones that dragged me here..."

"But you didn't leave..."

"I would have, if it was possible." His eyes flew to the narrow windows for a second. "And I will very soon..." he said like he meant it. For some strange reason Trowa was very inclined to accept his word. He was feeling somewhat trusting on it. Wondered if Heero felt the same way, that could explain a lot of his behavior.

Duo was still intrigued about that... aura. "You are human." It was a statement, not a question, and Trowa looked puzzled, not understanding what could possibly make the demon doubt this.

"What?"

Duo wondered if he knew about that... thing, because he felt the other truly muddled and oblivious.

"What did you come for?"

Trowa didn't answer immediately, still figuring out that comment.
"For this..." he glanced over his shoulder to the black blood spread all around, "... mess." He sigh, annoyed, knowing he would need to do something about it before calling the servants. His critical eyes turned to the creature remembering the wounds he had seen on his friend. "Heero told me that you said you won't harm him."

The demon frowned. "Yes, I said that. And that was a one time offer valid just for him," he growled in obvious frustration; it was a bitch to admit it.

Trowa nodded, fully understanding the concealed threat in it. With a last look in those eyes, vacillating about the baseless belief in that creature, he left the door threshold, going back into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

(...)

The sunlight woke Quatre in that morning. He slowly opened his eyes; he hadn't slept well at all, too tired from the exhausting trip. He had a calm and peaceful nature, preferring to do things slowly, paying attention to everything around him. He was a wanderer, with no place to call home, just going with the flow of life, hoping to find and follow the signs that might lead him to the only thing that really matters.

And for a while, a long while, he had been having only lack of luck in his quest.

So, when the chinese man appeared in his camp, saying that his lord was needing a skillful healer, someone who could deal with some unusual situation, he hadn't reason at all to refuse. Moreover, he'd been told that he would be payed for and could stay in the castle for however long he wanted.

He was mainly moved by curiosity and his perception, not by money or comfort. But again, there was no reason to refuse. Who knew what that could turn up for him? Also, just that very man, Chang Wufei, raised his interests. He could tell that the man might be some expert in the field, so why would his lord need yet another healer?

He was quite quick to dismantle his camp and gather his belongings. So they started for the castle a few hours later. But halfway to their destination, they were intercepted by two other men of the same lord. Something was apparently wrong, very wrong, despite the fact that none of them would say what. They had orders to head back right away. The call had become more interesting, so the blond just agreed to rush with them, even though he was a little worried for his buckskin mare[3], not used to a fast lope.

When they arrived, with some lame excuses Chang left him in the servants' care. Quatre saw himself accommodated in a large room, a nice change for someone who normally sleeps on the floor. Even between the hurry and tiredness he had another sensation: some good feeling, a thrill at his nape, a strange comfort. That just raised his hopes.

Before he fell asleep, he heard some commotion, that seemed be across the hall. But when no one came, he didn't bother to find out what it was about.

Then, in the morning, still no one came to call on him, so he didn't wait. That good sensation stayed there and he was very curious to see... everything. Maybe finally he was on the right path, after so long searching blindly.

It was early, but when he climbed down the stairs into what should be the common hall, it was oddly empty; he needed to busy himself with looking for someone.

He didn't need to search long, the emptiness made the sounds echo quite easily, and he followed them. The voices that he heard were coming from large decorated doors, cracked open. He didn't mean to eavesdrop, but that thrill on his nape became strong, making him shiver and he froze due to the fierceness of his own emotions.

The conversation wasn't loud, but the obvious annoyance surrounding it meant they couldn't keep it low.

"I saw him early. He was in bad shape, but not..."

"Well," impatient, Chang interrupted, "I saw him at night and my first thought was that he was dead! Pale, all sprawled over the beast in the middle of that mess of blood." He shivered with the memory. "What was Heero thinking? He said he let it drink his blood..."

"The poisoning scared the hell out of him. He really thought the demon was dying."

Chang threw a dry look. "It's that I can't understand. This... worry."

"You really don't, Chang?"

Wufei shut up beneath the intense green gaze. Swallowed hard, rubbing his face; he was so tired, overwhelmed by the idea to prevent what was happening in some way. How could Heero develop feelings for a demon? He who had lost so much because of them. The whole situation brought him memories that he would rather be kept out of his mind, leaving him with an, almost forgotten, aching in his chest.

"Doesn't it bother you?" He knew that Trowa had lost a lot too.

Trowa shook his head. "Maybe. I... kind of..." There was no way to explain that trustworthy feeling, apparently the chinese man wasn't affected by it. "You saw that it's appearance wasn't even close to the demons we are used to. I don't believe that Heero was in danger."

The black eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. What the hell? "The appearance didn't matter to me. That creature doesn't belong to our world. Doesn't matter if angel or demon, heaven or hell, we shouldn't..."

The chinese man looked away, lost in thought, unconsciously rubbing the length of his left arm. He knew it was already too late. Even if he was the skeptical type, he knew what it meant to fall in love at first sight; he also knew that this kind of love didn't always strike instantly, especially for another species. Maybe Heero was physically safe, but his heart will be broken as certain as the sun rises every morning. His hand slid to his aching chest, feeling some pressure, a squeeze there. For an instant he doubted if he was worried about his friend's feelings or for his own. He had made strong efforts to lock them deep and push them aside to forget.

He was just too tired, not wanting to deal with any more. Ignoring Trowa, he pushed the door wide open to get out, being surprised by the small blond man standing there.

Wufei had totally forgotten about him. Trying to gather himself to be, at least, polite, "Oh, Sir Winner, I'm sorry... was a busy night and morning." But then, noticing the somewhat pale look on the other's face, he wondered how much he might have heard. Anyway, those aquamarine eyes were telling that he didn't care at all; they were embedded on Trowa, behind him.

"This is Trowa Barton," the chinese man introduced them. Just a bit suspicious about that look, but fully intending to leave him in Trowa's care. He just needed to put his mind, his heart, at ease right now; maybe some meditation would help.

Quatre repeated the name, as a whisper under his breath, when he stepped ahead stretching his hand.

Trowa found that brightening look strange, like it was full of... need. Though he took the hand to shake politely. "Nice..." The words died in his mouth, caught by surprise by the sudden feeling of... home? It was a shock, an electricity passing through his whole body. He shivered, widening his eyes. "... to meet you... Sir Winner."

A little smile blossomed on the blond's thin lips. "Please, call me Quatre..." He pressed a little hard with the handshake, holding a bit more than usual.

Trowa didn't know what was happening; when their hands separated he felt a need to grab it again. "Have we... met before?"

"No..." Quatre said with sheepishly smile and a very tender expression. "I've never met Trowa Barton." And that wasn't a lie.

The awkward moment was broken by the sudden commotion, calling their attention, out to the library.

"Heero, you look like shit!" Chang's voice called out as he lead the other inside the library. Heero sat on the couch and the chinese man leaned against the massive table, crossing his arms in front his chest, his expression cold and concerned. The lord, avoiding looking at him, let his eyes flow curiously from Trowa to the other small man in there.

"I'm Quatre Winner, at your service, my Lord." The healer rush to introduce himself, happy to break the heavy atmosphere. He noticed the man was pale and shaky, some bruises appearing on his neck, besides the high collar of his shirt.

"Heero Yuy." The large sleeve slid a bit when he extended his hand, showing Quatre bite marks on his bruised wrist.

The blond turned it a bit to take a better look. "Demon's bite," he muttered. Quatre made himself comfortable sitting beside Heero on the couch, pushing his shirt's collar aside to see the purple stains, fingers shaped, on his skin.

Even though he hadn't had his attention in the words he eavesdropped on before, he had processed that they were talking about some sort of demon. And it didn't take much for him to figure out what the 'unusual situation' was about. He just didn't know what they could possible expect him do.

"So... It's about this you bring me here, my lord?" he asked softly, reaching for a small bag attached to his belt.

Heero nodded looking at Trowa as he pushed one chair near, taking his hand to start bandaging it. Then Quatre stopped him, his fingers lingering on the tall man's hand, making him shiver and turn his gaze to the blond finding some sweetness in the blue eyes.

"Allow me..." he said, holding a little bottle. Even though the glass was dark brown, whatever liquid was inside still shown with a blue light. He dropped just one drop in each fang hole.

All three looked, astonished; the wound consuming the transparent liquid that really glowed blue and healing completely.

He took Heero's hand dropping a little more on his palm, and led him to brush in his own neck and wrist, making the bruises disappear. Ignoring the surprised looks, he gently asked, "Then tell me about... it."

It took a moment for Heero to organize his thoughts, for some reason he felt free to tell all to the man that he just met. Maybe it was because that small frame, the innocent face, the gentle eyes.

Chang made some sarcastic and irritated comments now and again. But, when Heero couldn't find the words to say why he thought that should be a fallen angel, was Wufei who finished with, "Astonishingly handsome... " in obvious exasperation.

"Oh..." the blond chuckled, a bit puzzled. "You know, high level demons can be... beautiful too in some way."

"No. Not that dark mix of beauty and horror. He is just... almost ethereal, like I imagine an angel should be."

The blond sensed the protectiveness, the care, that the lord housed about the creature. And wondered cautiously how... to explain things.

"I'll take that you know little about fallen angels."

"Not more than that they can't be killed and they were expelled from heaven for having sinned," Trowa said.

"That is kind of true, at least part of it. Fallen angels are the ones that were heaven's outcasted by God himself, when they chose Lucifer's side in the rebellion. They taught some things to the human kind, just to dare God. They were few, but were the very first ones, most archangels, so they were stronger than any other. There didn't exist someone able beat them, or even match them; that's why they can't be killed."[4]

Quatre made a small pause, sensing the strong suspicion coming from the chinese man, while the other two appeared to just be absorbing the information.

"So, I'm pretty sure that what you have here can't be one of them. There's no way they could be beat like you said. Fallen angels still in the angelical form, they can't bite and drink blood like this."

"What the hell... So, just a Shinigami?"

"Why not?"

"I don't know... it's just..." Heero rubbed his eyes confused.

"You know, my lord, Shinigamis weren't exactly demons. They have a lot of physical similarities, but they were servants of Death. You told me that he had the symbols and a divine scythe[5]. Shouldn't be any doubts..."

Heero shrugged, tired.

"That's ok, my lord," Quatre said, his hand coming rest on the lord's shoulder, noticing the frustration coming from him. "There any more injuries that I can heal for you?"

"Just his..."

"What?"

"He brings you here to heal the demon, not him," Chang said coldly.

Quatre stood, mouth agape. He guessed it something strange, but not that strange. "I thought... you wanted me here to heal... you, once... well, I understand that you wanted to keep this creature..."

"No... no like this... he isn't my prisoner..." he ignored the snort coming from Wufei, "I just... I want to help him..." Heero didn't want anymore judging looks, the questions about his interest, his care. He wished he could heal Duo enough just with his blood, so he wouldn't need to deal with... the others, with the startled looks like that one the blond was giving to him.

"I'm sorry, I'm not sure if I can do something for... him", Quatre was concerned, starting to understand how extensive the lord's confused feelings were.

"This ointment you just used. It is like nothing I ever saw. It's quite powerful. Maybe..."

"That... will hurt a demon, even a shinigami."

"But..."

"If you want me to look at him, I will. I just... never..." He hardly would be able to do something like that, but he would do what he could to please the lord. He had no intention to leave the castle anymore. "If you want... help", that sounded dubious, "why not return the weapon?"

"I..." Trowa started a little loud, but then correct himself, "We won't take any chances to have... a bigger problem."

"Right, I will see what I can do then."

"Thanks..." Heero simply said, overwhelmed and exhausted.

"For now, you should get some rest... I will ask for something hearty for lunch, so you can gain some strength back." Wufei approached with arms crossed in front his chest, he couldn't get rid of that resentment. He saw Heero take a deep breath and stretch himself out right there on the couch.

They left the library, with a huge awkward silence, broke with some hesitation by Wufei .

"You know a lot about inhumans, and said things with this such confidence... This kind of information isn't easy to obtain... how did you find it?"

For an instant Quatre did not know what to say, a little worried for the chinese perceptiveness. He couldn't say the truth, but also couldn't lie. "Well I wander a lot through the world. Collecting information was one of my... intents."

That didn't lessen Wufei's apprehension and distrust in the little man. His behavior was more than odd; something that he hadn't noticed the day before. But when Quatre turned toward Trowa, asking to lead him to the woods outside to look for some herbs, he just decided that he didn't want to drown himself any more in that mess looking for answers. He just wanted to ease his mind, make it blank, meditate a little.

(...)

Some hours later, Heero came again to the demon's room. He, actually, should have gone back to his own room, to sleep a little more, but that strong want to be near Duo made his feet carry him there.

He found the creature sitting on the long bench near the window, the only other piece of furniture, besides the bed, in the room. He was wearing a clean pair of pants. His long hair was spread across his back, wet, dripping all over. The good wing, half unfolded, letting the black feathers shine beneath the sunlight. The demon had a long look, faced staring away through the windows, lost in thoughts, wind blowing on his bare chest without notice the cold of winter.

The brown hair shining in gold strands; all of him seemed to glow with the sun, surreally beautiful, making the lord's heart skip a beat. Even the dirty bandages didn't break the magic of the picture.

With a unreadable gaze the demon turned to him, even though he hadn't made any noise or move. "Better?"

Heero nodded, walking toward him, awed for the sight. He stopped in front of him a bit uncertain, his hand reaching to brush a lock of long hair behind his ear. His fingers sliding over the brown silk until the shoulder.

That honey gold color making his heart ache with bitter memories. It was the warmth of his skin that woke him. The lord didn't know why he wasn't shoved off, so he let his hand rest over the demon's shoulder. His eyes evading the purple ones, finding in the dirty bandages something to talk about.

"We should change the bandages..."

Duo's eyes stared a moment at the hand on his shoulder, wondering why he let the man come near him so easily. He eyed his broken wing, biting his lower lip, really not wanting to jostle it.

"The leg at least..."

He turned his eyes to met the man's, studying him. "Why bother?"

"I want you feel better..." And that sounded vague even to his ears, so he amended, "The healer agreed to see you... if you'll allow..."

"Why? Do you think he can do something?"

"I'm not sure. But, at least he is willing to give it a try... so, if he can, that will be another way, beside my blood, to heal you..."

The demon frowned a little, wondering why any human, healer or not, would be willing try to heal a demon. He knew better. That surviving was only possible if you don't hand your trust blindly to others.

There was enough going on with that blue eyed human. He knew, deeply, the reason for it. But others? Duo knew he shouldn't.

Even though, if the lord really wanted so much to help and heal him, he had one easy way. "You know... the easiest way to heal me... if you want to..."

Their eyes found each other for a moment, feelings twisting around.

Heero let his fingers linger over the slender, strong arm, tracing the subtle line of the biceps, a little damp because the wet hair. He tried not to think about the found scythe; he didn't know what to do, what to say, and, truth be told, he didn't want to think about.

He went to fetch a dry towel.

"Can I?" was the question when he came back stopping behind the demon, holding the towel with both hands to indicate it was about the wet hair.

Duo tilted his head with a suspicious gaze to find the lord's blue eyes. He felt the nostalgia in that simple action. So he just shrugged, turning his face to the window again, just one more in a list of the intimacies that he shouldn't allow.

Heero smiled and started rubbing the towel through the hair. The trust that Duo had in him, if he could call it that, was his only coin of exchange. If there was some way to make him allow Quatre to see him, because Heero had seen the peaceful nature of the blond. He really was hoping that something could be done.

The silence between them was intimate and comforting, broken just by the rustle of the towel. Heero didn't know where this came from. Maybe it was the blood, maybe the kiss, he wouldn't risk asking.

When he thought it was dry enough he tossed the towel and started brushing gently with his fingers. Duo let his head fall back slightly, expressly enjoying, and Heero let his fingers slide on his scalp, on the back of his neck, stroking, massaging firmly.

"I had a young sister..."

He said when the demon lifted his head, returning to loosening the knots, brushing the whole length.

"She had long chestnut hair that brightened to gold with the sunlight, just like yours." He stayed quiet until the long hair was loose enough in his hands, smooth and shining. The demon stayed immobile, having his own bitter nostalgic memories with that sweet touch.

"Sometimes she'd come to ask me to tie her hair and I always just shoved her away. She was much younger than me; I was at that age... trying prove I was a man instead of a boy. The last thing on my mind was how I lost my precious time helping her with her hair."

Duo just waited for the other to swallow that sour guilt, feeling a rhythmic movement on his hair.

"When I noticed that was just a way to show affection, it was too late. The one time I did her hair, I had no idea the way she liked it, so I buried her with her beautiful hair braided."

The purple eyes widened for a moment at the sadness. A thick braid was put over his shoulder with the tip loose, his hand reached for it, aware of Heero turning around to stand in front of him. He could feel the grief.

"I'm sorry..." he said looking at the braid and not at the other. At that moment he didn't know if the pain, the regret, hovering in the air was his or the lord's, maybe both.

"Not as much as I am..." He reached for the braid, actually touching the demon's hand over it. "Her death was my fault. I made a wrong decision, didn't follow my feelings trying to prove something that I even know now..."

Duo looked straight at him, his violet eyes lightened by sun, letting the lord hold his hand "Demons attacked the castle and I wasn't here to protect it. I lost her and all my family that day. My fault cost a lot to others too, like Trowa..." his thumb making circular drawings on the back of his hand "For now, the only healing I can offer you shouldn't endanger any other but myself..."

If the demon truly was able to read minds, he should understand this. Their eyes still locked, and Duo turned his hand where it lay, cradling the lord's hand in return, his sharp claws tracing the inner lines of his palm.

"Even you blame yourself. You hate demons. So why do you want heal rather than kill me?"

Duo already knew why, maybe better than the lord himself. Still...

Heero didn't answer and Duo sighed, giving in. "Probably will be useless... but bring the healer here."

"Thanks for trusting me..." a tiny smile almost showing on Heero's lips.

"You, again, jumping to conclusions. What makes you think I trust you?"

Somewhere inside Duo an alarm sounded. He felt the need to set things straight. His defenses weren't down at all. "You are the only one that I said I wouldn't harm, but that means nothing if I feel some... hostility. Don't forget how fragile you, humans, are." He squeezed Heero's hand to emphasize his words, without really hurting him. "Anyway, it's your own castle, so you can do whatever you want. Just be aware of the... consequences."

Surprisingly, instead of being afraid, the look on the lord's face softened and he stepped closer, bringing the strong dangerous hand up, placing a kiss in the middle of his palm, a promise kiss.

"I assure you, that hostility against you never even entered, nor will ever enter, my thoughts, Duo." With a shy smile he walked to the door, leaving a puzzled demon behind.

"Though this is all for you..."

(TBC...)


Notes:

[3] I don't know why I made Sandrock a mare, I thought it just fit well. Buckskin is the color, kind of a cream-colored body with black hooves, tail and mane.

[4] I did some research about fallen angels and found a lot of sources and versions. So I kind of goal oriented made this up. I have no intention to follow some specific line about it, and it won't interfere or matter to the plot at all. Hope no one feels... offended if something wasn't quite right.

[5] That too hadn't any real base, maybe some concept of Death in Supernatural, but I just made it up. So here Shinigamis had the same characteristics as demons (like bodies that burn with holy water, and fangs to drink blood), but they weren't demons. That means if they lost the bond with his divine weapon he can't heal, on the other hand, demons (also angels) rely on their inner essence to heal.


# I'm sorry, this wasn't supposed to finish here, but I needed to once again split the chapter, because it became too big again. Also, splitting it here seemed a good idea to keep some mystery about Quatre's appearance... I'm a little afraid that the 4&3 part is developing too fast and, maybe, calling more attention that it should.

~ * ~

Chapter 6

 

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