"Why Me?"

Written By: Kaeru Shisho

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Gundam Wing or its characters, nor do I make any monetary profit off this story.

Rating: NC 17

Warnings: AU, language, male x male

Pairings: 1x2, 3x4

Summary: Trowa is pushed into dating Duo in order for Heero to see what he lost, realize his mistakes, and get back together. Will that work? Really?

A/N: This was started years ago and I resurrected it and Waterlily edited it, for which I am very grateful. Hope you like it!

"Why Me? "

Chapter 3

(o) Zechs' POV

"Chang Wufei, you are working awfully late on a Friday night. Une riding you that hard?"

"Nuh uh-?"

Nothing comprehensible came out, and the color had drained from his face, so I assumed that I had surprised him with my sudden appearance, or shocked him with some possible sexual innuendo, and I smiled to counteract any bad impression I may have made.

"Sir?" he said, saluting curtly. The gesture wasn't strictly necessary, but he was always deferential to my military status, which I found admirable and very pleasant.

I nodded and watched the color return to his face as he pulled himself together; knowing I'd achieved my first goal, to put him at ease, must have spread my smile to my overall demeanor.

"Merquise, you seem in high spirits this evening."

Indeed, I was both pleased and looking as if I was. "Actually, I successfully carried out a little matchmaking; my good deed for the week."

"Did you?" he said, completely composed now; in fact, a mite smug with the addition of, "That's interesting; so did I."

I didn't mind his arrogance; it was a necessary part of the total, self-confident man, in my opinion. I felt a sudden frisson of excitement tingling through my extremities. Then another notion occurred to me. He wouldn't have been involved in the failing Yuy-Maxwell romance, would he? Not after we argued over how to execute a plan!

"Oh?" popped from my lips before I could stop it.

"Just because I didn't like your plan, didn't mean I was against the idea of it." He stood and adjusted his jacket. "Excuse me. I have a little undercover work to do."

"You haven't a field mission assignment- that I know- so, where are you really going now?" I asked, hoping against all hope it wasn't to reconnaissance the same place that I was.

"Trowa asked Duo on a date. I thought I'd go check-"

"Dear, God. You didn't suggest he take Duo to that new Thai restaurant? Tell me, not to that place, please?"

"Of course there. It was my idea. You rejected it when I suggested-"

"I'm not a Thai man myself. My mistake."

"Then what's the problem?"

My misunderstanding; I could see that now. At the time, I'd thought he'd been asking me to dine out at the Thai restaurant first. As a trial. Before sending his friends to eat there. I'd rejected the idea categorically- another mistake on my part, but it had been an impulsive, visceral reaction to the idea of attempting to seduce Wufei while tackling spicy hot food- and before I could suggest a more romantic place of my choice we'd been interrupted by a frantic co-worker. And he'd stormed off to answer the call of duty.

Had he thought I was rejecting his overtures as well? Of course, he had. How could I have made so many mistakes in a row?! Well, Wufei Chang must have charmed me to distraction, that's all I can say. On the spot, lightening quick, I conceived a plan to correct all the wrongs I'd assumed I'd made.

"So, you say you are going to go spy on them? Oh, don't look at me that way." Actually, I adored his prissy-mad expression. "Let's just call it spying and, well, frankly, so was I, only... and you won't believe this... I set up Winner with Yuy."

"What?!"

I'd shocked him with the knowledge of my adroit matchmaking.

"And you sent them to the same restaurant? They are there, together, NOW?!"

Or, possibly shocked him with the ugly possibilities our miscommunication brought forth.

"Yes." Now, at this very moment. "Oh dear." I couldn't help from sighing, fatalistic as it sounded.

"So we carried out independent schemes to get those two idiots back together and ended up bringing them all to the same restaurant at the same time?" he summarized.

"This could turn out terribly," I concluded.

He matched my sigh with a weary one of his own. "And after all the trouble I went to."

"Yes, I know," I commiserated like the blamable cohort that I was. "Lighting the fire beneath Yuy's ass wasn't any swim in the tropics."

I felt relieved when he looked me in the eye and smiled. Yes, he'd enjoyed our accidental meeting in the Bahamas, too. Of course it hadn't been any accident on my part. I was still paying Une back for giving me that emergency time off which enabled me to join Wufei.

How attracted to me was he, though, I wondered? How deeply?

"So, what should we do now?" he asked. "Go in and stop this nonsense or just wait and see?"

Could I take it as a promising sign that he now deferred to me? I'd just have to believe it was and ask him out.

"I vote for the latter. I don't think there is anything more we can do, no way to make things better by our further interference. In a way, it's like watching a strip tease. Don't ask how it's done; just enjoy what's coming off." *

I did like the way a smile warmed his face. "We should team up on this operation," he suggested.

"Wise idea. Undertaking surveillance of a dangerous nature requires backup."

"And is far more pleasant with company," he agreed. With little further fuss, Wufei accompanied me to my vintage Jaguar and snuggled into the butt-hugging leather seats.

"Comfortable?"

"Perfectly."

"Excellent, then on to the restaurant. Thai Jungle, correct?"

"Ah, yes. I had suggested it from the start."

"I acknowledged the wisdom of that choice already."

"Yes, yes you did."

I avoided looking at his face. I could feel the smug expression and hear it in his voice. That was sufficient, I think.

We took up our watch from across the street, using a parked van for camouflage. He borrowed my binoculars, his being in his car back at Preventers. I wasn't all that interested in watching Huey, Dewy, Louie and whomever, not with the exotic, the prickly, the hotter than Sahara sun Chang Wufei in my car.

"I see them."

"Both couples?"

"Yes."

"At least they made it through this much of a meal in close proximity of each other without blowing up the place." I chuckled lightly and won a little laugh in return.

We shared a warm moment and then continued our watch on the door. Several minutes later, the first of the couples emerged intact, followed several minutes after that by the second.

"And... there goes couple number two."

I had to point out the obvious flaw. "Paired up incorrectly still, but, somehow they ought to sort themselves out."

"Eventually, but that might take time. Our job here is done, what little there was."

"I agree. Mission over. The real work, you'll agree, was in the preparation phase. We make an extraordinary team-" Before I could sing our praises any more, especially since we hadn't teamed up particularly well during the crucial planning part, I noticed he was preparing to leave. "Where are you going?"

Wufei didn't take his hand off the door handle, but he didn't engage it either. He turned to me sitting there behind the driver's seat before answering in tense, clipped sentences. "Inside. I'm here. I haven't eaten and I'm famished. I like Thai, so I might as well see if I can be seated. I'd invite you, but I already did and you refused. So, goodnight-"

Ah, I'd nearly failed to progress fast enough and was about to lose my momentum. This was my moment. My move. I took it. "May I suggest an alternative?" I lifted a single platinum eyebrow and observed his eyes track the movement.

Wufei attempted to look carefree, but sounded intensely interested; either that, or I was being overly hopeful. "You may, but be quick about it... for all those reasons I just stated."

"Lobsters, champagne, view of the harbor?"

That stirred his curiosity. "Lobsters?" His eyes glazed over. "I've never tasted one."

I nearly grinned with pleasure, but managed to control the spread of my smile to stretch slowly. "I know you like fish. I made reservations. I'm sure the table can be set for two."

Fish. Yes. That unexpected rendezvous in the tropics had opened Wufei's eyes to new possibilities. Dating aristocracy-an enlightening experience he might desire? Being seduced by Zechs Merquise-exquisite, possibly?

"I've never eaten lobster," he repeated with a bit more wistfulness this time, "and wasn't certain if they weren't the stuff of poetry and dreams only."

He settled back into his seat and closed his eyes. Since he didn't look like he was going anywhere, I started the engine and signaled to pull out. "Think of them as big shrimp, which sounds silly so they made up the name 'lobster' instead."

Wufei liked a man with a good sense of humor, he'd said once, and smiled appreciatively at my feeble attempt at a joke. "The best parts of this planet are the oceans."

"Hmm, that's because you lived on a colony all your life. The mountains, valleys, and deserts are enjoyable, too."

"You've traveled everywhere, then?"

"Oh, not really, but I have a villa here, a cabin there... Perhaps you'd be interested in the higher elevations this weekend, if you have no other plans?"

"Higher elevations? I assume that's slang for something?"

"No, no, no. I meant, if you could alter you plans, I'd love your company at my mountain retreat. There's skiing, if you're interested."

"Skiing, yes, of course." With a bemused look, Wufei must have concluded that, indeed, his work-week had ended. "You mention plans. My regular appointment at the dojo shouldn't be put off."

"You won't be without a workout of a different sort, should you choose." I tried not to appear too wolfish when I smiled down at him expectantly.

"I see. Well, in that case, no, I have no pressing engagements that can't be changed."

Very good. Very, very good. "La Mer followed by a stop at your apartment to collect a change of clothes, and then we are off to wintery Glenwood."

(o) Trowa's POV

"Duo wants-"

"Not now," his whispered voice snapped through the cell phone, cutting me off. Quatre could whisper sweet nothings, all right, but he could also pull off his command voice at will. "I should stick with Heero," he added.

I kind of wanted Quatre to tell me to forget the whole date thing with Duo, and come straight home. "Duo wants me to keep him company at his place. Stay over but-."

"Yes, do that. Good bye-"

"Overnight?" I asked just to make certain he understood.

"Whatever it takes. We agreed to everything, in case something like this came up. I'll keep Heero occupied."

And with that comforting thought, my boyfriend shut off his phone.

Okay, well, I wasn't doing anything wrong. I put away my phone to count out the bills to pay our dinner bill, which took longer than necessary because Quatre's behavior had me confused. I wasn't making passes at Duo and I didn't see why my boyfriend-of-some-time was flirting with Heero. I felt he was carrying out this "date" undertaking far too seriously.

But that was only one problem. An overnight camp out at Duo's was a fresh new problem, which my imagination dwelled upon as we left the restaurant.

I couldn't believe what I'd gotten myself into.

I'd thought at the outset that Duo and I'd have a bite to eat, pick up a few donuts, and then I'd drop him off at his new apartment, before I'd head back home to Quatre.

However-

Duo's apartment, as it turned out, was in the spacer neighborhood, and his appointment to see the little space-jumper up for sale was far earlier than I thought a Saturday morning ought to begin.

Which was why-

Now, we were aiming for the donuts, then a sleepover at Duo's place, then a Saturday crack of dawn appointment at the shuttle launch building.

I escaped to the john and called Quatre again. At least, when I called and explained, Quatre seemed understanding about the extended duration of my plans. He had plans of his own, but he didn't go into details, implying, again, that we'd discussed all this earlier and that I shouldn't feel I had to check in with him. I guess I had been a participant in that conversation with him. I didn't remember that conversation. He wished me a good night, tagging on a whispered "I love you" this time, for which I was glad. I'd needed to hear that vote of confidence.

A night with Duo wasn't hot sex with my lover, but it was all right. We watched a couple rented action movies while eating our "donuts" including my personal favorites: one bacon encrusted, another pizza-like, smothered in cheese, and something oozing caramel with pecans. Duo ate one that was so loaded with chilies I could feel the burn without tasting it. We polished off a six-pack then put in a DVD to watch, some atrocious romance movie.

So far, we hadn't uttered one word about Heero or Quatre all night. Truly good. I don't know what kind of shit I would have stepped into had I opened my mouth and tried.

And then... It must have been the alcohol knocking my judgment off kilter, because I missed the clues leading up to it, and our conversation slid into the 'feelings' trap.

"It's really easy being with you. Funny, huh?"

"A little. Hey, we get along fine, because there's no sex involved. That confuses the issue."

"No sex. Huh. Guess that's it. Start talking about feelings with Heero and one thing leads to another and -"

"Spare me."

"Bingo! Back to bed, heh, heh." He looked over at me and grinned. "Can't see Quat being all domineering like that."

"No? Then you don't know Quatre very well." I smiled inwardly as I recalled Quatre backing my ass into the wall the other night, and ripping the buttons off my shirt...

"It's a good thing, right?" I watched his smile go a bit crooked. "I mean, if I had, then you wouldn't have, right?"

"I don't know." I really hadn't followed his train of thought very carefully, what with Quat on my mind, and was slow to catch up. "Wait! Are you insinuating that if you'd gone for him, that I wouldn't have had a chance?" Why I got defensive, I do not know exactly.

"What? No, that's stupid. I meant," and here he paused to make sure I was following his convoluted logic, "that if he and I had a thing going, you wouldn't have interfered."

"Oh." I had to think hard about what he'd said; meaning the wine and beers had bent my brain.

"You wouldn't have, right?" he repeated.

He was so insistent; I really had to come up with a sensible reply. "I don't know." Even I knew I'd failed. I didn't need to look at his "try harder, asshole" expression. "Okay, I might have made my feelings on the matter known to him so he could have a clear choice." I finished off the last of my bottle and stood to get another. If I was going to have to talk about personal shit, I was going to get smashed. "I'm going to the kitchen. Want another?"

"Another kitchen?" Ha, hah. "No, but you can bring me a beer."

"If you're lucky," I muttered with what I hoped was a chuckle.

I carried two cold beers into the living room and offered him one. "You would have done the same if it had been Yuy and me."

I watched his face change expressions and hoped he wasn't going to find a way to twist what I'd said into a dumb joke.

"No, I wouldn't have." Duo was staring unfocused into the distance. "I wouldn't have stuck around. I couldn't have done that." He fell back onto the floor, eyes closed. "That would have hurt too much."

Ah, he still loved him. Great. And how did he feel about him dating Quatre, I wondered? "I point out that you are still here now."

His eyes flew open and he rose onto one elbow to stare directly at me. "He was eating dinner with Quat, that's all. Entirely different thing."

"Oh, so if they're eating that's okay, but if they're fucking, then it's not."

He sighed. "Yes! Geez, Tro' wouldn't that matter to you?"

"Sure, but that's me. I already said I'd push you aside if I thought I had a chance. You said you'd give up and run. That's all."

"Okay, I said that, but I meant I'd let him have who he wanted if that's who he really, really wanted. I know he's not... that he's not... that he hasn't fallen suddenly for Quat."

Interesting. I had been right from the start. I hadn't thought "mission: date switch" would work. Heero and Quatre? Hard to see that going any place. "I can see you with Qua-atre," that was hard to admit and get past my lips, "more than Yuy with him, for what it's worth."

"Me and Quat? No way. We're close, but we haven't enough in common to rock a relationship."

"Yeah, but that can develop. Quat and I were pretty far apart, at first. We had the war, our Gundams... Yeah, that was about it."

"You had music in common. He liked to go on about that. You'd play flute and he'd play violin. I'm not the least bit musical."

"I'm low key, you're off-key. Musical."

"Be straight with me."

I stared at Maxwell until he broke up laughing. Tears leaked. He was awesomely hysterical for a minute.

"Fuck! I'm glad you're gay," he said between gasps for air.

"I thought you wanted me to be straight. Make up your mind."

That set him off again, ending with a bout of hiccups. I gave him a glass of water and he settled down.

"I actually kinda get how the Winner lifestyle," he motioned expansively and lightly doused himself with water, "can get to you after awhile."

"Having most anything you want can get old." Okay, I was being sarcastic again, but I wasn't sure what he was getting at and I'd too much alcohol to think very hard.

"All that stuff has a way of owning you." He sat up and then closed his eyes against the sudden motion. Being intoxicated didn't stop him from putting his thoughts into coherent words. I was impressed by his skills. Again.

"Point in case," he said. "I was visiting Quat once when he was putting on some fancy-ass shindig at his work. You were on a case out of town."

"I'm not much for workplace parties." I wasn't much for any large social groupings, and Quatre knew that and was sensitive to my feelings- in the extreme. He arranged events around my timetable and for my convenience, when he could. "He planned things that way so I wouldn't have to make excuses for avoiding parties." I smiled because little gestures like that he did for me proved how much he cared about me.

"Yeah, well, he pulled me in with promises of food. It was all... peculiar...awful stuff... farro and goat... I starved!"

"Oh,yeah, that one." Quatre had told me how the caterers had gone all out to impress the guests and forced Duo to go on a hunger strike. "Heero and I were partnered on the same false-warehouse case at the time. Real cesspool of evil that one-"

"Probably. Anyway, one of the guests - it may have been me-bumped into one of those heavy gold framed paintings he has hanging in the hall, setting off an alarm. Dinner had to wait while he confronted staff and soothed the security guards that all was well. Just saying, you know?"

"I know." There were parts of the Winner mansion I wouldn't set foot in for fear of setting off proximity alarms with just my presence. "The staff has to count the fine silver and lock it in a safe after a party just for insurance reasons."

His big blue eyes gazed at me. "No shit?"

"Truth. Still, the small consolation prizes he awards himself as he struggles through each day are worth it." I may have rubbed my thigh as I recalled the last time he'd taken me in the smoking room.

"Prizes like you."

Oops. I'd slipped up and only then did I realize it.

"You and Quat... you're still together. This entire... thing was a setup."

Duo had plied me with drink, probably twice as much as he'd consumed, and cleverly arranged this mild interrogation. I was rightly a little awed. I certainly wasn't clear-headed enough to lie convincingly, so I didn't try. "Yeah."

"Yeah? I guessed right? Cool. So, why?"

"Not my idea," I insisted.

"Well, no shit. I wouldn't have accused you of dreaming up something so...weird."

"Bone-headed."

"Certifiable," he upped the ante again and chuckled.

I bowed my head, grateful for his confidence in my sanity. "Yuy's supposed to see what he's missing, get jealous, or something, and try to get you back. Or something along that line."

"He won't, you know. Get jealous, I mean. If he really thinks someone is in his way, he'll just-."

"Kill the fucker."

"Right. So you're safe. If he cared, that is. Still, he won't buy this any more than I did."

"Didn't think so." I tried to sit up, felt woozy, and just stayed put.

"So, the ship thing? You don't have to go through with that."

"Yes, I do. I want to. That's between you and me, Duo."

I heard him sigh and stretch out beside me. His fingers touched my arm. "Thanks, man. I was hoping that was for real."

"I have to say-" I worked out what I was going to say and ran it past my judgment, and promptly forgot the wording when it came to saying it out loud.

"Don't over think it. Just spit it out. That's what I do," he recommended.

"Okay. This has been a great evening, being with you, talking with you. I just wanted you to know."

"Thanks." Duo actually blushed. "Yeah, that means a lot. It's been the best for me in...a while. Even when I ... had Heero, I needed... a friend to talk to about the other stuff he wasn't interested in."

"So, before you crash completely, call him and tell him how you feel."

"Can't. Not yet. But you should call Quat."

And I did.

(o) Quatre's POV

Heero dabbed his tongue onto a high-tech device the size of a fingernail. "Good. I'll take us directly to your home, and leave your car at your office."

"Oh?" My confused response must not have been what he'd expected and it earned me a glare and a frown.

"I established that my fast metabolism has processed the wine I'd consumed to within the legal limit for driving. I can see that you should not attempt to drive yet."

Oh really, Mr. Know-it-all? Sadly, he was right, and knowing this irritated me slightly because I could tell I had over-sauced my verves, um, nerves, and become intoxicated. I didn't give him the satisfaction of knowing that and hid behind a shy smile. "That's okay. My car has spent the night there before." My judgment wasn't totally trashed by the wine, but I was having trouble remembering why I'd thought a date would change things for him. I hoped I'd remember soon. At least I still had my sense of humor, which I tested out on him. "Drive on! My sloth-speed metabolism will initiate detoxification when I fall asleep."

He grunted and I closed my eyes to re-think the wisdom of using humor around him.

Oh. Dear. What had I done? Planning to date Heero, getting him to realize what he was missing not being with Duo by being with me? Trying to make him change his priorities so as to move Duo to the top of his mountain of work? It had all seemed logical at one time, but now I was afraid I hadn't given proper weight to the personalities involved.

I thought I had.

Now, I knew differently.

Honestly, I'd given Duo much too much credit and trusted his assessment of Heero too much. He'd said Heero had changed. "Heero's not scary, Quat, he's just a workaholic."

And I believed Duo, since he knew him intimately, while Heero and I had hardly exchanged a hand full of words in the intervening years. I'd seen him at a distance, in passing-and lately he'd looked glum-but we hadn't talked. Trowa had spent more time around Heero at Preventers, of course, which was how I knew our friend was hurting over losing Duo. Trowa had said he seemed okay and we all know what that means: he was suffering horribly over losing Duo. And for Zechs Merquise to call me to voice his concerns over the status of Duo and Heero? What did that have to say about the tilt of the planet? Off-kilter!

Still, this was Heero Yuy, one tough cookie.

I'd been in awe of him as a child-terrorist. His dedication, single-minded determination, and self-sacrifice to the cause came to mind first and foremost. What truly stood out in my fifteen-year-old mind; however, and what fueled my imagination and what I'd venerated was his unholy strength and stamina. I both admired and feared him when he was a boy fighting for his causes, and now years later I discovered that I still harbored that uneasy mix of feelings for him.

He made no attempt to hide his emotions, or even temper them. He radiated intensity from his accusing glare to the unyielding set of his shoulders. Suddenly, I admired my happy-go-lucky friend for having stood up to this man and daring to love him back. I'd only been with him for two hours and already exhaustion was setting in, while Duo and he had co-habitated for years. Was it a wonder that Duo ran way!

I'm sorry. That wasn't fair. Heero wasn't that severe. I was just not used to feeling intimidated.

"Are you feeling okay? Do you want me to stop somewhere for coffee?" he asked. He looked concerned, his eyes kind.

I'd been so nervous; had I'd missed his softer side when it shone through?

"Oh! I'm fine, thank you. Tired, mostly." And confused, a little over my head, and "excited" was in there someplace as well.

He made a sound of agreement and drove on.

And then we were pulling up in front of my home. I wasn't ready to go inside. Not just the two of us. Not just yet.

"It's nice out," he said.

Maybe he wasn't ready to go in either? I went with that and asked, "A walk would be nice, and you haven't seen the mood garden, have you?"

"Mood garden?"

"Oh! Did I say 'mood'? I meant 'moon' garden. Silly me. Where is my mind tonight?"

Wherever it was, somehow I'd struck a chord with Heero; he was chuckling.

"Moon? I think 'mood' makes about as much sense. Wait. You're serious. There really is such a thing?" he asked.

"Yes, there is." I quick-stepped past the gate and shrubbery to the opening in the tall hedge, barely visible in the gloom. "See? Well, if the moon were full you'd see better."

Oh, dear. It was pretty dark overall. And the wrong season.

"It's...like a moonscape?" He was trying to be kind, I knew.

"In summer, when the flowers are in full bloom, everything is white, you see, or silvery, and it glows, in a way, when the moon is out, especially. Over here!" Roses, thank God some flowers were open! "You get a sense of what is would be like, don't you?"

"Pretty." He wasn't looking at the flowers, though. He was looking at me. "Romantic."

"Ro... Oh, of course! It could be, couldn't it? Not that I had never thought that, but I wasn't thinking about that right now... not that you're not... I mean. Well, you know?" I hoped he did because I had confused myself. I hoped he wouldn't notice how jumpy I was.

He just stood there with the strangest little smirk on his face.

"What's that look for?" I asked, not liking the knowing smile of someone thinking he was more informed.

"I could ask the same. You are the one that kissed me already tonight."

Oh, dear. I had, hadn't I? With all the courage I could muster, I looked him in the eyes. It was dark so it wasn't the same as in the light of day where nothing was hidden. Still I noticed how relaxed and open he was, as compared to me. I was wound up like a caffeinated cat in a too-small box. I know, because I had only just last week taken one of my cats to the veterinarian after it lapped up the triple espresso Trowa had left on the floor by the chair where he'd been sitting before jumping me... They so loved cream!

"In fact," he went on, "I will."

Will what? Kiss me? Here? Now? Heero?

My expression must have been a dandy one. He didn't move closer. "Ask," he said, "what that look means?"

I knew the tricks of debate. I had to turn the conversation back onto him. "My look means nothing, well, honestly, it's you. You haven't looked that alive for some time."

And his face fell, darkness settling in again. "There hasn't been anything to be interested in lately."

If Heero expected some argument, I wasn't going to give him one. I was ready to listen to his story.

"He left me. His stuff is still at our place, though. I see him at work. I still...miss... him. It's hell. But what can I do?"

"You could discover the root of your problem?"

"I've thought about it. Hasn't he told you?"

I shook my head. Even if Duo had confessed the details of their love life, I wouldn't share that with Heero. As it was, my dear Duo had kept any terribly personal problems to himself.

"I thought he'd told you, of all people, about all my short comings."

"No, he has never complained. He has only good things to say about you." Ever. "Let's go in."

On our way indoors, my hand on the door latch, I paused, thinking I should warn him. "You should know. Trowa's belongings are still here, too."

He said nothing as I led him past a couple ground floor rooms, settling on the study for the duration of the evening, which opened into the library and my research desk.

I had a complete mock-up set of 1/100 sized Gundams and the headset of a ZERO system decorating the walls. He gravitated to them first thing, which I'd counted on.

"I'll get us coffee. Feel free to look at anything." I rang for Amin and placed our orders then poked at the embers to stir flames in the fireplace. I sought comfort in the realness of fire. Sometimes I longed for the deserts of L4 and sitting around a campfire, listening to the glorified stories of bravery from the Maguanacs.

As I reeled from the pangs of my own homesickness, I discovered that I was collecting Heero's feelings as well. The additive factor nearly knocked me out! "Oh, He-ero!" He was so sad.

He shook his head and stepped further away. He needed a hug, I could tell. Despite his move to distance himself, I enclosed him in the most generous embrace I could. I would have shared a kiss, but he turned his face to the side, and then I felt him pushing me away.

"I can't, Quatre. And it's not that you're not an attractive guy."

Can't-? Oh, my! Did he think I was coming on to him! Well, of course he might! "Oh! I didn't mean anything by that!"

"No?"

"Just comfort. Really! You seemed so sad and that's just how I react."

He smiled and I could tell he understood immediately. "Duo's like that. Hands on type. Okay. So," he waved at the computer on my desk and dismissed the entire episode, "is this where you are doing your ZERO research?"

What little I had done, yes. I had to distract him from looking into that too soon. He'd see my modest progress and question me and think it was all a farce, which it was a little bit. I would let him step back from personal things, though. "Wouldn't you rather watch a movie first? I could use a break."

He slumped onto the couch as the big screen rose out of the console. "Fine with me."

The coffee arrived with the most delish little date-filled fig cakes Amin's wife made. We dug into them even though we'd just eaten a large meal, and settled back to watch I don't remember what. An action film from L3. I think.

"Tell me you're watching this and I won't shut it off," he said an hour later.

It wasn't worth lying about. "Not."

You'd have thought I'd shot a current through his chair, the speed at which he arced off the couch. He stooped over my desk and glowered at the dark computer screen as if he were expecting ZERO to materialize if he willed it hard enough.

"There's this you can play with." I opened a cupboard door and revealed the "search eye".

His hands clenched and unclenched. I passed him a small device I kept hidden away.

"Power it on and," I waited for multiple windows to pop up on the monitor, "you can monitor the programing, control the input, and see how the data is stored."

He found the head apparatus and without hesitation rested it on his crown and snapped the connector to the "eye" box.

This was perfectly safe. It merely read certain brainwaves, metered his heart rate, and sorted the data into a complex database, more or less. I didn't expect it to entertain him for long and it didn't.

He played with the data, running the few analytic tools to examine it. "When I think about snails, it shows that I'm disinterested; when I think about Duo, I'm agitated." His dark stare settled on me. "ZERO System for Dumb-asses?"

I laughed nervously, which came out like a giggle and turned into tears. Not manly. Not what I'd planned on.

"Ah?" he sounded very uncomfortable with me. "Sorry?"

But then he hugged me. He initiated it this time. I'd had more intimate contact with Heero Yuy in one evening than all the intervening years since we'd first met.

"Hey, relax. It's okay. I was joking, though, doing a poor job of it." He patted my back and even smoothed little circles over my shoulder blades. It felt nice. His murmuring sounded nice. Everything about him seemed nice, even his wool-jacket smell. "I didn't expect you to let me hook up to the full-fledged system tonight. Honestly, Quatre, I didn't anticipate this much would even be functioning."

I felt foolish to carry on so. I wiped my eyes and sniffed, ready to move on.

"Thank you for... everything. Trowa wouldn't let me near any of the technology."

"For your safety, I'm sure."

"Yes, but I needed... I still need to work through some of my issues and he won't even let me talk about it. I think he has nightmares with me being under Zero's control."

"I wouldn't be surprised. He was nearly killed. But you know he forgave you ages ago."

"Yes, of course. I know that."

"Then what's wrong-? Oh, I see."

"You see what?" I wondered.

"It's me."

"Now, now, Heero. It's not all about you, you know." I think my smile looked as real as it felt and he chuckled. "You fascinated me so much during the war, with your brave stunts."

"Hn. I was just an idealistic, stupid kid. I didn't know better. You had the big picture."

This time I showed teeth like a peal of breakers over the sand. "I still do."

He was handsome wearing the tentative smile that suited him so well.

"I can see what Duo is so attracted to," I said, bringing a blush to his cheeks. "It's really nice just having a friend though."

Heero's shoulders relaxed. "Yes, it is. I hadn't noticed how small my world had become. I probably expected too much of him, wanting him to fill all the roles of friend and lover and... I can be intense, I know."

"About that, Heero," I said cautiously. "Oh, my cell! Pardon me just a moment."

It was Trowa, so I stepped away to take the call. "Hello?"

"Hey, howsit going with you?"

"Fine, was that all?"

"No."

"Something is bothering you, Trowa?"

"Yes. Want a list?"

"I did warn you of your role in the plan-"

"Was this when I was distracted in bed? 'Cause, I missed a few details like watching my boyfriend aggressively flirt with my partner at work."

"I didn't know you'd show up at the same restaurant for your date."

"Another problem."

"What else?"

"Duo knows. He figured out what was going one. Don't underestimate Yuy."

"It's not working out like I'd hoped," I admitted.

"Maybe not, but some good can come of it. Duo and I have a little...project we'll be looking into tomorrow."

"Something fun?"

"Yeah, it might be. Anyway, I wanted you to know I love you and miss you so you'll be thinking about me."

"Oh! I-I... well, feel the same. The very same!"

"All right then. Be careful. We'll talk later."

"Yes, yes! Thank you. Good night."

I wasn't sure how to face Heero now. "Well..."

"That was Trowa, wasn't it?

"Yes, it was."

"He hasn't really moved out, has he?"

"What? Well... um, no. I'm sorry. Heero, we are too good of friends not to be honest here," I said.

"This must have been a hard thing for you to do." Heero folded his arms over his chest. "You must know how much Trowa's hating all this."

"I'm more worried about Duo being mad at me for hitting on his ex."

"He's not-"

"He is, Heero! And hurting him was not what I'd planned."

"You concede this was your doing-this... false date?"

"Yes, yes... a bit of a silly plan I'll admit..."

"Close friends hitting on their exes? Yeah, I'd say it's one of your worst. What were you thinking, Winner?"

"We were hoping you'd be jealous enough of Duo dating Trowa to see how much he meant to you and get back together. Oh, dear... that's sounds pretty weak."

"Totally stupid. And Merquise, naturally, that makes sense why he was pushing me. Who else is included in this idiotic stunt?"

I gave up protecting anybody. "Wufei."

"Hn. He hadn't dared to suggest anything to me, although getting us all to cross paths at the same restaurant sounds like his kind of... not at all subtle."

"No," I agreed. "He's not subtle, but I'm not sure he intended for that to happen. I certainly hadn't. It was supposed to take a while, not blow up on the first date."

"So ZERO?" Heero waved his arm over the computer.

"Partially a fabrication to get you interested in me." I felt the heat rise into my hairline and hated the blush response. Trowa adored it, but in front of Heero it was embarrassing, which only magnified the damage.

"I don't know about the interested part." He shot me a quirky little smile. "I was hoping you weren't on the verge of insanity."

"Very funny! If I were, I'd be getting professional help. Trowa wouldn't let me go near a project like that, without hovering over my shoulder."

"I wondered, that's all," Heero said, backing off a tad. "Trowa never mentioned it to me and I can't see you keeping a secret that big from him. So, it there some gadget you are developing; it's not a total fabrication?"

"I've been wanting to look into, well, there's a project I have in mind, and it's not about ripping out your brain functions and replacing them with Fantasyland."

"You're being an idiot now." Heero turned back to the computer interfacing with the "search eye". "You really think there's a safe way to utilize this technology?"

"Yes, I do," I assured him. "I'm not nearly there yet, of course. Just think of communicating with people who are unable to speak! What if we could communicate with coma victims, or-"

"Or with animals," Heero grinned as a look of surprise erupted over my face, "or aliens."

"Ha! I hadn't taken it that far." I chuckled along with him.

"There is a lot of potential here both to do good and evil. It's one step away from designing commercials that feed off a viewer's impulses or something."

I rushed to shut that notion down. "I'd have to keep the technology secret and control its applications, certainly, but the medical applications are endless. Imagine brain damaged patients being able to communicate or allowing their doctors to understand them better? It just fascinates me! As I said, Trowa was adamant that I not go it alone with this and yet he has no interest in being tempted by its 'charms,' as he calls the program's attractive features. None at all. And Duo wasn't considered, I mean, he isn't-"

Heero stopped me from saying more. "I wouldn't think him suited to research projects like this."

"My thinking exactly."

"I would like to participate. It's challenging, complex enough to be interesting."

"Yes!" I cried out with excitement.

"And I have plenty of time on my hands."

We caught ourselves staring into one another's eyes and blinked. "I really am glad to have you for a friend, Heero."

"Yeah. It's something I've missed."

"Yes, someone to talk to and share things that, well, a lover can't."

"There's that."

"And find satisfaction in a hobby he doesn't have to be a part of." I was so pleased that this idea struck a similar cord in him. A solution to our relationship woes, perhaps?

TBC

Chapter 4

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