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"Agglomeration"Written By: The Plotting Housewife Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Bandai, Sotsu
and associated Parties. This work is written for pleasure not profit. Rating: R Warnings: Yaoi, Romance, Drama Pairings: Trowa/Quatre Summary: After the Eve wars, Trowa and Quatre address their tumultuous bond. Notes: Written for a photo prompt for @morbidbirdy
on Tumblr. "Gravity " The base was quiet this time of night. Only the steady hum of machinery reverberated through the steel walls. Most everyone was already asleep with the exception of the night guards patrolling the graveyard shift. There was a small lounge located near the back of the base and Trowa blinked under the bright halogen lights after flipping on the switch, then thought better of it and turned them back off. The only light that remained was the glow from the vending machines and he felt his way around in the dark until he reached one of the two padded armchairs that sat side by side near the window. Beyond the aluminum frame and slightly cloudy glass was the endless expanse of the snow-capped Himalayas. Only the white of the snow was visible at this time of night and they gleamed under the light of the full moon like frozen beacons. He sunk down into the chair, wrought with fatigue, laden with contemplation. It had been a while since they'd last seen each other and their reunion was full of awkward tension. Their last meeting had ended when his fellow co-pilot kissed him. It had been tentative, timid. The boy's blue eyes gleamed with hope when he'd pulled back, teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he waited for Trowa's reaction. Trowa had known there'd been something special between them, almost from the moment they met, not that he'd been willing to acknowledge it at the time. He knew Quatre had felt it, too, though he wasn't sure how. He hadn't stuck around long enough to find out. He also hadn't stuck around after that kiss. He tried to tell himself it was simply Quatre's pain medication and excitement over the end of the war. An impulse. Which he knew wasn't accurate and his logical mind called him out on his attempts to lie to himself. Quatre was not impulsive. Everything he did was carefully calculated, thought out in intricate detail beforehand. Even under the influence of morphine, Quatre had known exactly what he was doing. Even under the influence of Zero, he'd known exactly what he was doing. Now, if that wasn't indicative of a powerful mind, Trowa didn't know what was. At any rate, he had not been emotionally equipped to handle more than that shy kiss. He'd known what existed between them. The almost omnipotent bond that had taken on a life of its own, spinning between them like a neutron star, its gravitational pull too strong for either of them to pull away from. They orbited it, falling deeper into its clutches. Trowa had known there was no escape, but he ran all the same. Back to the circus. Back to familiarity, the convenience of not having to deal with the weight of this...this whatever it was. He honestly had no words for it. It was too compelling, too gravid for mere language. It transcended Earthly confines, uncurling itself into uncharted territory, skirting the realm of absolution. It fucking terrified him. That was the long and the short of it. Who was he, a lowly foot soldier, a grunt, a Nanashi, to be blessed with something so significant? Things like this just didn't happen to him. It was against some fundamental, universal law, he was sure of it. But, despite the odds, this stunning creature, this pillar of light and hope had seen something in him he never knew existed and was drawn to him, felt the pull just as powerfully as Trowa had. And he'd known it was only a matter of time before they collided again. The burning question was, would they continue to bounce off each other, or come together for good? To meld and coalesce into one? He knew the bouncing off part had been him. If Quatre had had his way, they would already be together. Trowa was just too afraid he'd singe his wings. His and Quatre's. But, human nature, the laws of physics, whatever it was, inevitably brought them back together. Being sucked back into war again after he'd found a somewhat comfortable niche at the circus. It was lonely, but it was proverbial. And safe. "Fancy seeing you down here." The soft, almost intimate murmur didn't startle him. Through their peculiar connection, he'd felt the boy's approach. He'd sensed Quatre's inability to sleep as strongly as his own. The weight of the singularity between them needed to be addressed before it either collapsed and sucked in everything around them, or exploded under the energy of its own friction. No matter which way the pendulum swung, it could be disastrous for everyone involved. He knew that as surely as he knew Heavyarms' algorithms. The soft shuffle of Quatre's footsteps came closer, his vague shape in the dark crossing in front of his line of sight. He plopped down in the opposite chair with a heavy sigh. Trowa could feel the intelligence, the rapine spirit in those blue eyes as they focused on him, somehow seeing him clearly where Trowa's eyes strained to make out his features in the murk between them. His fingers drummed along the arm of his chair, then came to rest in his lap. Quatre's voice was muted, speaking with an uncharacteristic reluctance. "It's been a year." Trowa nodded absently. "It has." "How've you been?" "Fine." He sensed Quatre's wry smile. "As talkative as ever." He cleared his throat and shifted in the chair. "Trowa, I'm...sorry if I made things awkward between us. If you really don't feel the same, I understand, but I'd hoped we'd at least be friends -" "You're lying" He paused. "Excuse me?" "You know damned well I feel the same." Another pause, and then cautiously, "How would I know that?" "Don't play dumb, Quatre. You know it just as well as I do." Quatre looked down at his lap, his fingers fidgety. "Then...why?" Trowa's shoulders lifted in some weird combination of a shrug and a stretch. "Because...I don't know what to make of all this." "And your response is to just run away and refuse to address it." Trowa glared at him, knowing Quatre could see it. "Forgive me for not understanding something I've never experienced before -" "Do you think I have? Do you honestly think I understand this anymore than you do?" Yes, Trowa honestly thought he did and was a little surprised to discover this was as strange for Quatre as it was for him. He didn't even know why he'd thought that now. His tongue was tied, a little lost for the right words. Where did they go from here? He felt Quatre's lassitude at the situation, his confusion, and his frustration. He saw the blond head dip in a nod of hopeless finality. "Right. I'm sorry I interrupted your...solitude." He stood up, stepping past Trowa on his way out of the lounge. What Trowa did didn't even require thought. His body responded instinctively as it typically did where Quatre was concerned. His hand shot out and snagged the boy's wrist before he was out of reach. Quatre stumbled a little as his momentum was halted. Trowa stood up abruptly, steadying him with firm hands clamped around the blond's upper arms. He felt Quatre's shallow breaths against the skin of his chest, hot and moist. His brain was furiously warning him not to fudge this up. You've done what everyone else has wanted all your life. Drop your fucking balls, Barton. Be a man and take what you want. Heero's voice echoed, unbidden in his mind. Follow your heart. His hand lifted, curling around the boy's soft neck, tangling in the wispy curls of his hair. His thumb brushed the skin beneath his eye. His own eyes, more accustomed to the dark now, could easily make out the puzzled, anxious expression on the upturned face. Quatre's fingers, shaky with adrenaline, touched, feather-light against his lips. The gentle caress sent a spark of heat down his spine. Trowa did the only thing there was left to do. He spoke the absolute truth. "I don't know where things go from here. I don't really know what this is. But I know I can't stay away from you. I tried. I tried to forget it. I tried to ignore it, but...I just can't. I can't not be around you. It eats me up inside in ways I can't even begin to describe." Quatre's lips pressed together, looking up at him with eyes that were as open and expressive as the cloudless night sky. Once upon a time, that had terrified Trowa. Now, it left him feeling almost weak with euphoria. What had I been so afraid of? "That's a good question," Quatre whispered. His mouth curled up at Trowa's soft laugh. "When you kissed me, I panicked." "I know." "Can we...start over? Is that possible?" Quatre leaned up on his toes and brushed his lips against Trowa's. His breath was warm, soft, full of promise, of limitless possibilities. "Anything's possible."
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